Funny thing happened on the way to revenge...

Okay,

I was never actually interested in revenge.

But an abject lack of forgiveness plagued me. You see, there were a couple people who really betrayed me in the past. With a renewed sense of faith, it was easy to recognize that forgiveness was "the way" to deal with the situation....but the reality was that I just didn't feel like forgiving. Something's hardwired into my brain (and maybe most people's brains) that makes forgiving very hard to do.

Nonetheless, I gave it my best effort. I used Christ as my yardstick. And I used time as my walking stick. For all outward appearances, I had truly moved on from events of the past.

Fastforward a couple of years: I've come to believe forgiveness is as much a journey as it is an act. And on the journey, amazing things can happen.

For instance, my spirit of forgiveness (however hackneyed) has been infectious. What happened to the two folks above? Well, things are working out. The three of us are not worse for our conflicted time; instead, we are better. A cycle of trust, warmth and enthusiasm has developed amongst us. And, my guess, is that more than the three of us have been impacted... that this warmth and trust has gone on to infect those around us as well, spreading outward like a pebble in a pond...

The reason: forgiveness.

The source: Jesus Christ.

The prognosis: very good.

Amen.

The Gospel according to Peter, Paul and Mary

I used to love this song as a kid! See how things come full circle?!

"If I Had a Hammer"
Newport Folk Festival,
Newport, Rhode Island, 1963

More than Twelve Steps

A good friend recently compared my return to Faith to his recovery from drug addiction -- full of hope and relief ....but ultimately transient. After eight years of recovery, he's become attached to worldly things (like house, wife, dog) and suffers because of his attachment. Whereas, in his first year of recovery, he gave it all up to go to God to get well. He was at peace back then because he had nothing left lose. (click here to listen to Janis Joplin sing about nothing left to lose.)

And, he's adamant that his experience is not unique but one shared by most recovering addicts.

I'm only eight months into my return to Faith so still in the "honeymoon" phase, so to speak. Accordingly, in a few years I too ought to be disillusioned and back to the daily grind of struggle and disappointment.

However -- I'm not convinced.

Nor do I believe are the millions of others who have returned to (or found) God after years away. Maybe the delta is the intent. Converts seek God for truth in its purest form and to live honestly by Him while on this earth. They find this Truth in the Bible, the Word of God. By its very nature, the journey is unselfish. Jesus makes no bones about it: charity is the mainstay of Christianity....and that charity may take the form of much suffering over a lifetime.

But addicts come to God as a release for personal suffering. Truth and God are present in the 12-steps to recovery, but the focus is on the self. Moreover, the 12-steps allow for a broad interpretation of God -- defined by whatever makes the individual comfortable. Neither Jesus nor the Bible are referenced.

And, that makes all the difference.

We humans go reliably astray when trying to define God for ourselves. Our innate selfishness serves to skew the pursuit even further (i.e. the current and failed trend to seek "personal happiness" as a primary life goal.) Yet, through the Bible, we learn of a richer, enduring goal. One that serves God and, accordingly, the greater good. Personal suffering may be present. Material wealth and status may be forfeited. But the intrinsic sense of "rightness" of doing good works on God's as hands and feet is unmatched by any man-made reward or ideal.

At least, that's the best way I can describe it right now. I'll let you know in a year if I feel the same.

Click here to go the 12 Steps.